I can’t change what’s happened, but I do apologize.
I can only choose what I do now. I don’t believe in “redemption” on a certain level… Once something’s happened, there’s no going back.
I’ll be using nicknames to retain privacy.
I apologize to C-Bear. I don’t know how to explain our recent falling out, but I do miss you. I don’t like you in the same way anymore (that wasn’t a lie), but you’re still fun, cute, and endlessly spontaneous.
I apologize to Saru Deli. We’re cool now, you’re my best friend, but I still feel bad for stabbing you in the back… It hurts me just as much every time I think about it. Thank you for sticking with me through my worst.
I apologize to Cakes (Box). I don’t want to see you… I don’t want to ever to meet your new boyfriend. But I mean that in a twisted, psychotic, flattering sort of way. I ache when I think about you because I’m still emotionally attached to you. I loved you more purely, and more deeply than that motherfucker is capable of – so fuck him. I guess in the end we just weren’t mature enough. I’m not always the smartest, most polite person, but I do care about people… Goodbye love love. (My Cakeys).
I apologize to everybody else. Sorry for attacking you, yelling at you, or just being rude or inconsiderate.
After writing this post I feel a lot better. The three bolded above are the ones that mean the most to me, but unfortunately 2 out of 3 may never know I wrote this since we’re not on any kind of speaking terms and this blog is pretty new.
I’ve also lost two meaningful people… :\
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